Friday, March 23, 2012

Wine snobs: pay attention to what Jesus said

So what is a "wine snob?" My definition is the guy (usually an alpha male) at your dining-out table who lets everyone know that he knows more about wine than anyone present. Therefore, we all defer to him to order the wine. Naturally, he selects something difficult to pronounce and, usually, it's quite expensive. Of course, this is before we decide who will pick up the check.

What this fellow can be counted-on to order is something that tastes akin to vinegar. After placing his order, the waiter usually says: "Very good, sir!"  This is the recognition and applause he's waiting for. When the bottle is opened, our garden variety wine snob does the all the testing, you know, the twirling, the sniffing, the whole nine yards of wine snobbery. Then, everybody at the table does what he expects: enthusiastic agreement on "how great his choice was!" Then we manage to get the stuff past our pallet.  For kicks, sometime I'd like to say, "Ugh! This stuff takes like gasoline!" But, I probably never will.

However, at this point, if one enjoys inexpensive "boxed wine," brands with names like Franzia or Peter Vella, it takes a bit of courage to say it. However, do not be afraid! After all, Jesus himself, in John, Chapter 2, Verse 10, saith: "Everyone brings out the choice wine first and the cheaper wine after the guests have had too much to drink." In other words, according to our Lord and Savior, there ain't nothin' wrong with boxed wine, folks. Serve it!  Enjoy it!

Usually, if we have guests over, my spouse makes me buy some "bottled" wine. After I serve everybody once or twice with that, I take their glasses and fill 'em up with a similar type of boxed wine. Nobody complains. Everybody drinks--heartily! And I'm following the advice of Jesus.

Boxed wines--the two brands I mention above--comprise our "daily wine" around the house. Frankly, I think they're pretty good and a great value! I know, I hear the wine snobs groaning. We always keep a box open in the fridge and prefer it to the vinegar some wine-makers put in bottle at five times the cost.

Where I live, in Fargo, North Dakota, we can buy 5-liter boxes of Franzia and Vella for around $12 to $15. However, when we visit Florida, I can only find the 3-liter boxes (I've looked all over). Don't know why that is. If you know, send the answer to my email address above. I'll incorporate your explanation into a future post.

If you want to read more about wine snobbery and other "snobberies," go to the "Snobsite" by clicking here.

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